"We need a cleaning schedule."

Oh.
We do, do we?
Fine. Here's the "new" schedule:

When you get out of bed, make the damn bed.
You're standing right there. Perfect time to make the bed.

When you get out of the shower and throw your towel on the floor, shove it around a little to soak up all the water you slobbered all over the floor.
You've got the location and the tools, go for it.
(If you want to go the extra mile, hang up the towel when you're done. Hey, look! A towel rack! Right there. )

When you take off your clothes, put them away.
You are already holding them; simply carry them to the drawer or closet. Is this rocket science?

When your clothes are in need of cleaning, put them in the laundry basket.
When the laundry basket is full, I'll wash it.
(If the basket is empty, surprise, I don't do laundry. I know this one is so hard to understand.)

When you spit something out in the sink, keep in mind that no one will be taking inventory of it later, so please rinse it down the drain. Immediately. Before it dries there.

When your homework is finished, pack it up and put it away.
This accomplishes several things:
1) It gets your homework where it needs to be when you leave for school;
2) It gets your homework out of my way;
3) It makes me stop nagging you to finish your homework

When you're done playing with that game, put it away.
When you make a mess, clean it up.
When you open a drawer, close it.

And can anyone explain to me why there's uncooked macaroni behind the toilet?
Nevermind. I don't really want to know.

When in doubt, clean it/something/anything before I do.

Carry on...