Wednesday, April 10, 2024

One Good Thing 4/10/2024


I got a raise today.

It's an annual, every-gets-one kind of raise, not based on merit.
But, I've worked in plenty of places where no one ever got a raise.
So, I'm happy to work in a place where I get even small raises every year without having to ask/negotiate/beg for one.

Another one:
My boss went out of her way to call me and tell me in person before she told anyone else. I'm gone on vacation the rest of the week, and she didn't want to make me wait until Monday to find out.
It's possible that company policy required that she tell me before the end of the pay period Friday. But still, she went out of her way to accommodate me personally. 
So, that was nice.

One more:
Two days of PTO this week! Yay!
Today is my Friday. Four day weekend begins today!

Monday, April 08, 2024

Card Carrying Member

For Christmas, one of my coworkers gave the rest of us gift cards to her favorite take-out bistro down by the river. We've all been waiting for our schedules to line up on a day with good weather. Tomorrow will be that day.

Co 1: I'm not sure where I put my gift card. But I'll find it by tomorrow. 
Co 2: Mine is at home. I just have to remember to bring it.
Me: I've been carrying mine around since the day I got it.
Co 2: The way you said that kinda makes it sound like you think you're better than the rest of us.
Me: And that's exactly the way it was intended. 

Sunday, April 07, 2024


Early morning conversation...

The Husband: The cat was playing with one of his krinkle balls in the middle of the night.

Me: With enthusiasm. 

He: Up and down the hallway.

Me: I woke up enough to wonder what the noise was, but as soon as I realized it was just the cat I fell back asleep. 

He: Same.

Neither of us could find said krinkle ball this morning. Safe to say we'll be in for more shenanigans tonight.

Thursday, April 04, 2024

One Good Thing 4/4/2024


I asked a question in a group chat, and another participant said it was a good call-out then proceeded to present data that validated the question.

Tuesday, April 02, 2024

One Nice Thing That Happened Today


I didn't say outloud any of the angry things I'd been thinking about my direct supervisor today.

Another one:
Hours of pouring rain switched over to a beautiful, fluffy snow fall. It was a dreary, dull morning, but now it's a serene, pretty scene outside today.

One more:
I solved a work mystery quickly and with the first guess today.

Saturday, March 23, 2024

Suits: The Drinking Game

While watching the TV show Suits, take a drink everytime:

- there's a conversation in a bathroom
- anyone exits a scene by walking toward the camera
- Donna says, "I'm Donna."
- someone is interrupted while saying, "Before you say anything..."
- Donna enters the room out of nowhere and offers her opinion on a conversation that she had not been a part of

Monday, February 12, 2024

This Is Not Your Room

A gentle reminder to spiders and ants,

You get to live in my house provided you stay in your designated areas. These areas include:
 - in the walls
 - behind major appliances 
 - under pieces of furniture where cat toys can't fit

I believe I have been generous in this agreement given that I also allow you residence in closets, the basement, and the garage provided you clear the area as soon as a human appears. And you're welcome to resume activites as soon as the human exits.

But listen, one of you hung around the cat litter box WAY longer than the agreed upon parameters stated above. I reminded said subject of our agreement and requested immediate compliance. When they refused to budge, we had words. Eventually, they crept around the corner with what was clearly attitude.

I'm giving you all this opportunity to review our agreement amongst your group. Please remember to include all newcomers as they may not be fully aware of all the rules.

I appreciate your attention to this matter and look forward to many more years of peaceful cohabitation. 

Friday, January 19, 2024


Someone on Facebook asked what kinds of non-food things people anxiously chewed on as a kid, and it triggered a fast, steep rabbit hole of rude awakening.

My answer to the question was, "My hair."
When I was a kid, I used to tug a lock of hair across my cheek, and chew/suck on it out of the corner of my mouth.
I didn't think anything of it at the time. Some kids chewed their fingernails; I chewed my hair. Tomato tomahto.

So tonight as I was thinking back on that habit, remembering the wet crunchy sensation of it, I wondered what got me to stop doing it.
And I'm pretty sure I stopped because my mom convinced me to get the latest new hairstyle called "the shag". It was the way some popular model wore her hair, wouldn't I like that? A popular model? Why wouldn't I want that? Sounds great! What a cool mom I have!
I'm certain, today, that Mom was just trying to get my hair short enough that it couldn't reach my mouth. 
It was an effective tactic. I remember the disappointment that first time I tried to tug a lock of hair and found it wouldn't reach my teeth.

It was an awful hair style for my face. I spent all of grade school and middle school being mistaken for a boy. In 4th grade, a girl from another school once cornered me, told me I was cute and that she wanted to be my girlfriend. When I told her *I* was a girl, she said, "No, you're not!" I had to find someone to confirm to her that I was not a boy.

Effing awful haircut.
Effing messed with my confidence and self esteem during the most awkward decade of my life.
And why?
Because I had a harmless coping mechanism that wasn't socially acceptable. 

As my breasts developed, it became even worse because people couldn't process seeing a boy head on a girl body. Adults asked me to my face if I was a boy or a girl. Or, they'd ask my friends right there in front of me, because they thought it would be rude to ask me. Standing right there. Adults would.

After high school, I followed a 20-year pattern of growing my hair out and suddenly cutting it short. Each time I cut it, I hated it, and I swore I would never do it again. 
But I did.
The last time it happened I was in my 40's. My boss at the radio station where I worked was not a good manager, and that translated into a poor work environment for me. While venting to The Husband about how frustrated I felt, I pointed at my recently trimmed head and cried, "Just LOOK what it made me do to myself!"

And that really was the last time, because ^that statement right ^there helped me realize something.
Each radical haircut was coordinated with a stressful life event. Things like the end of a relationship, a new college semester, or changing jobs.

The pattern is so obvious now: 
Experience stress, cut my hair.
Experience stress, cut my hair.
Experience stress, cut my hair.
Changing my hairstyle was something I felt I had control over when I didn't have control over other things.

And today, after thinking about what non-food thing I chewed on as a child, I now see where this pattern started:
As a child, I'd experience stress, and when I'd self-comfort with a little hair chewing, I'd suddenly have to get my hair cut short.

Unwittingly, stress events came to equal, "Hey, it's about time for a fresh, new, short hair style, dontcha think?" 

I don't blame Mom. She didn't know this is how things would develop. She wasn't being malicious or mean; she was being a mother who did her best with the training she had, which every parent knows is no training at all.

This all has gotten me spiraling, dwelling on how the self-comforting thumb sucking and self-comforting security blanket were taken from me, too. 
Dammit, parents. A child's coping mechanism isn't the problem you need to solve. 😔


Btw, you guys, I started seeing a therapist a few months ago.

Thursday, January 18, 2024


Elder Son came over to do his laundry. He had two loads worth.

He: I'll be done soon. The second load is done washing. I'm just waiting for the first load to dry.
Me: Your second load has the towels?
He: Yeah.
Me: Towels are thicker. They're gonna take longer to dry than the first load.
He: But. They're towels. They're supposedto *do* the drying.

Sunday, January 14, 2024

Kindness of Strangers

Spoiler: *We* are the strangers
It is cold today. The high temp is expected to be -1C, and there's a -27 wind chill. The Husband reluctantly left the house to fill his car with gas. Before he left, he layered up with thermal undergarments and extra headwear.
He dressed this way to DRIVE somewhere.
It. Is. Cold.
So, you understand how odd it must have been when later I saw a man standing on the sidewalk across the street from our house. The sight of anyone being outside at all today caught my attention. He was consulting his cell phone with bare hands that must have been freezing painfully every second. A sled rested at his feet.
After a bit, he put some heavy duty gloves on, picked up the sled, and moved along. He stopped again at the corner and consulted his phone again.
I called The Husband to the window.
"What do you suppose is happening here? Is he lost? Do you think he's trying to meet up with someone? Is he looking for the sledding hill? It's really cold out. I wanna ask him if he needs help, but I don't know if he needs any."
We watched him as he continued up the street and disappeared from view. And then we kept watching. It wasn't long before his head came bobbing back. Yeah, he was lost.
"Do you mind if I holler out the door to ask if he wants help?" I asked The Husband.
"Please do. If he *is* looking for the sledding hill, I'll give him a ride."
And without even waiting to find out what the guy's story was, The Husband went to put on his coat and boots.
Through a short shouted exchange from our porch, I found out the young man was, indeed, looking for the sledding hill, and yes, he would gladly accept a ride.
I watched from the window as The Husband greeted the man in our driveway, and they both climbed into our car and drove off.

When he came back, The Husband told me the young man was new to town, had moved in 5 months ago.  He was just bored and thought he'd go sledding. Google had told the hill was just a mile from his apartment, why not walk? He'd turned at the wrong corner and ended up on our street. He wasn't cold at all, he'd dressed properly.
But dang, y'all.
How fast did my wonderful man jump up and volunteer to help out a stranger out in the cold?
That's top notch, first class humanity. Every day I find even more reasons to love him more.