I own nothing

I think I was actually married to the husband before I realized what he and his brother, Scooter, were doing. They have a habit of disowning their family members in casual conversation. Neither of them speak of "my mom" or "my sister". Instead, they say "your mother" or "I talked with your sister today," even though they share the same mother and sisters.
You know, like parents will say, "He's ~your~ son!"

I found this very amusing once they explained it to me, so I joined in... especially after the mother-in-law moved in with us. (Uh, yeah. It seemed like a good idea at the time.)

The BEST use of disownment came when Scooter came by to visit his mother... at our house. He knocked on the door to her section of the house, and when she didn't answer, I poked my head out my door.
"Your mother's not home," I told him. "She's visiting your sister-in-law."

It took Scooter a moment to realize that I was his only sister-in-law, and that his mother was "visiting" me.

And you will find that I still do this a lot.
"the husband"
"the mother-in-law"
"the children"

If they're not mine, you see, I'm not responsible for anything they do. Or say.
So, I own nothing.