Wednesday, August 05, 2009

Snoring, a follow-up

To all you wonderful people who are concerned for The Husband's snoring/health issues and encourage him to see a doctor about it:
1) Thank you, and
2) Good luck with that.

Forgive me. I apparently failed to mention that The Husband is a man.
And to a man, the word "doctor" equals "rectal exam".

To a man, somehow "Honey, I think you should see the doctor" sounds like "Honey, I think you should have your genitals fondled while you turn right and cough... and get a rectal exam."

Because men know that's all doctors do whether you're in for a sore throat or back pain.
You wanna see a man squirm? Make a sound like a rubber glove being snapped on.

It's not right, I know. But am I wrong?

8 comments:

Arwen said...

I'm currently having this VERY discussion with T, only over a dentist. He had not gone is :::cough::: SEVEN years and then the top of his tooth fell off (I kid you not), so I made him go. How they want him to go for a six month check-up and he is flat-out refusing to go, even if I make an appointment. What to do? I think bribing might work...

Priscilla said...

To which I say, 'Fine. Sign this insurance form.'

BH has the same snore, stop breathing, gasp for air thing going on. It got better after his sinus surgery but now it's back. In all it's terrifying glory.

I'm thinking maybe one of those mouth guard, snore stop devices may help.

But then again, he's a man too!

leeann said...

H snores like a moose in heat, and he's been checked from top to bottom for it. He's even had to sleep overnight, all tarted up like a fighter pilot, and it proved... he snores.
I have wonderful earplugs that have kept me out of jail many times.

Thumper said...

All it took to get the Spouse Thingy to *GET SURGERY* to attempt to fix his snoring was to threaten to never sleep with him again. When that didn't work (the surgery) he did the whoel overnight sleep evaluation because he finally got tired of being tired...and realized "Hey! I could have a heart attack in the middle of the night because of the apnea!" Apparently, the idea of no sex and dying will get them there...

Roses said...

Thumper: That's brilliant! Either the doctor fondles his genitals or nobody does.

::takes notes::

Bob said...

If that threat of terminating genital fondling fails to move him, try giving him the prostate exam whenever he starts snoring. That'll stop it for sure.

DogsDontPurr said...

Well at least I see that I'm not alone on this "stop snoring, go see a doctor" thing!

My Love does all of the above when it comes to snoring. I often have to womp him several times during the night to either stop snoring or start breathing again. I also resort to yelling "Dude!!! ROLL OVER!!! You're SNORING at me!!!"

Erf!

Why is it that we women lie awake listening to this and monitoring our guy's breathing, while they slip mindlessly into a deep sleep?!

It is really just not fair!

Harvey said...

It's not the SOUND of the rubber glove so much as it is the fact that they keep those damn things in the same fridge as the speculum.